Loren, You amaze me!

Dearest Loren,

When I first got my diagnosis, I was scared. I mean really scared. More so of how this all was going to affect us, and how I'd get through it, knowing you and the family the way I do. Or now, I guess I should say, knowing you the way I thought I did.

You dealt with this, pre-op, the way you deal with most everything else, with large doses of humour. At first that frustrated me. I thought you were being insensitive, and that you didn't understand how very scared I was. But I just did what I always do, and joked back with you, and at you.

Believe it or not, that helped. I don't know if you knew that, or if you were just being you. I think that if you would have acted differently, it would have scared me even more. But when I would ask you honestly, or talk to you openly about my fears, you were very sincere, and supportive. You said all of the right things, being the rock that you always have been. It took me looking at you differently, to see that you were doing the best you could. I had to understand that you weren't being insensitive, that you were just being you!

Having you there with me that day, with the endless waiting, was more amazing than I think you will ever realize. I was so worried that you would get bored, antsy and kind of crabby.......but you handled it like a trooper, and I was able to relax and just.....wait.

I have to tell you that threatening to go to corperate when they wanted you to use a vacation day in order to be at the hospital on surgery day.....the fight that you put up.....what everyone told me that you said to them, makes me so dang proud to have you as my husband. Sometimes they just have to let us be married, huh??

Thank you so much for being there when I went in, there when I came out.....bringing the girls up to see me.

Thank you for coming up in the evening after work, even though it was your birthday and you could have very well went out and been with the gang.

Thank you for encouraging {or maybe even threatening??} the guys to come up and visit. It's hard being "one of the guys" during something like this....but you got them there, and that touches me more than words can ever say!

I am so blessed to have you in my life.

I love you. I love you. I love you.

And I know you love me.